Blowing up planes: How cliché.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Consider this post an open letter to terrorists world-wide who seek to harm Americans:

To whom it may concern,

Stop trying to kill us with planes. It is annoying, and becoming terribly cliché. Hijacking planes, blowing up planes, flying planes into buildings... it's all very uncreative, and as you can see from the reactions of most people being interviewed on the news today, we're not scared, we're just terribly annoyed.

The plot which was uncovered (and quickly acted upon) today is obviously very serious and of great concern world-wide. I'm proud that our friends over in the UK were able to thwart it in time, before hundreds of innocent lives were lost. But really, guys... this plane fetish you have is childish. If you really want to terrorize us, keep making the oil prices go up. Spending $50.00 to fill up my cars gas tank scares the bejeezus out of me. That's $50.00 I could have spent on movies or electronics or on the whole collection of Girls Gone Wild. Now that is true terror - not being able to own every single volume of Girls Gone Wild.

I'm not saying I am inviting or want a terrorist attack. I'd really rather the US never suffer an attack again. But planes? Come on? What next? Perhaps you'll go for snakes on a plane? Oh, yes, that would be original. You should try that. I'll bet that's right up your alley. With creativity like that I'm starting to think that Al Qaeda works in Hollywood. Perhaps Al Qaeda can enlist the help of Bryan Singer to come up with its next mediocre plot to harm innocent people - just like Bryan Singer's mediocre movies harm the minds and pockets of innocent movie viewers looking to have a good time for a few hours.

Anyway Terrorists, I grow tired of your sad and pathetic attempts to scare the world into capitulating to your demands. If you wish to scare me, as I said above, drive the price of oil up to the point where even $0.99 for porn on iTunes (you KNOW it's going to happen one day!) will be too expensive because I have to dump $150.00 into my gas tank so I can buy food and go to the office.

Signed,

A Cynical Citizen of these United States of America (aka Infidels or some shit)

Technorati Tags: Terrorism, airplane, bomb, uncreative, gas, Bryan Singer.

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